Clearing away the cobwebs

I have been living in the same city, in the same area and in the same house ever since I was a baby. My parents came here a few months after I came crying into this world. I suppose that’s why I get extremely apprehensive about living someplace else. Truth is, I don’t know how to live anywhere except where I am. My house was almost empty back then- with a few chairs, one or two tables and a bed. Of course, it shows all the signs of being lived in for 20 years now.

I don’t have many memories of my life as a baby. Hell, I don’t even know what my first word was! My parents have filled me in a little bit though. I was mostly a quiet kid, not so much of a devil like my younger brother. Except for a few things like- not drinking my milk or trying to starve myself to death- I was, what people would call, a ‘boring’ kid. Not that I mind that. I actually kinda like the fact that I was different than most of the kids!

Back then, I was not as undisciplined as I am now, either. I used to get up early in the morning and drag my father outside on the ramp to watch the birds going about their morning chores.

My father also used to draw a small bird on my palm a lot- an image etched into my memory for some weird reason. I spent the entire day reading stories or writing something. My favorite game was playing ‘teacher’ where I used to read books and write whatever little bit I knew. Pretty boring, eh?

Maybe, that’s what made me change. Gone are those days when I would sit poring over different books and write stories and poems. In the last few years especially, I have seen more of the world than I should have, I think. Of course, shit happens. Part of growing up, as someone once told me.

Everyone gets homesick when they are away on a holiday or a vacation somewhere for a long time but since I have been so stuck up in this place, I start pining for my home, my room, the view from my window and even the smell of the polluted city air. And that makes the rest of my holidays miserable instead of enjoying them.

Since I am a college student now, there have been times when the question of taking up a PG or a flat has come up. Living all by myself is definitely exciting to someone like me who is extremely finicky about independence and privacy. But just the thought of living elsewhere scares the hell out of me.

Yes, I should take the plunge- I have to, someday.

I always spend months thinking and analyzing things. I made an exception here and decided to take the leap a few weeks back.

As I leave for house-hunting for the first time, I am excited and nervous at the same time, it's like a rush.

Walking towards the main gate, I look around and realize that I’m already bidding farewell to the grey buildings that surround me.